Did you know that no matter what we do, how we act, or what we say, there are five human responses to any action? Some people are going to love us, some will hate us, others may like or dislike us, and some are going not going to even care (be in neutrality). When we base our actions on trying to obtain a like or love response, we pick up the dark arrow of expectations.
To break this dark arrow, all we have to do is pick up the Light Arrow of Self-Love. When we love ourselves, we develop self-confidence in who we are, what we do, and what we say to the extent that any response we receive from others will not initiate our pretender voices, disrupt our balance, or propel us to pick up the dark arrows again. With Self-Love, we develop and maintain a strong commander voice that reminds us of our beauty, strength, wisdom, shining, and all our other amazing aspects!
Picking up the 6th dark arrow means we have already picked up the 1st dark arrow of attachments, the 2nd dark arrow of dependencies, the 3rd dark arrow of judgements, the 4th dark arrow of comparisons, and the 5th dark arrow of Expectations. We have created needs that are not based in reality, becoming dependent on them for short-term pleasure and long-term pain. We judge our self, life and others so we feel okay, and have found others that are “like” us so we can put down those who are “not like” us. Our delusions about these non-existent “needs” place in the center of expectations, reliving the past and all of the other “needs” that were not met and projecting to the future, convinced that those needs will not be met either. Sounds pretty bleak!
The 6th arrow on this dark side is the Needy Child Syndrome. This is the absolute need for love, recognition, acceptance, security, and support from others as a way to define and identify our self. This is the place where we are constantly looking outside ourselves to feel okay. This is acceptable as a child who cannot meet their own needs. But as adults, it becomes total self-indulgence.
The South Spirit Keeper, who guides your spiritual self-growth and development, in the Wheel of Allies is the Coyote. This gentle trickster teaches you about illusion and tricks you into the light by showing you your dark side with humor. As the south Spirit Keeper, Coyote is a teacher of trust, innocence, humor and love. S/he is also a teacher and protector of children and a master of disguise, camouflage and imagination. When you put on a coyote robe you can “see the world with a different eye”.